How do I tell him??

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My son, who is 8, was just diagnosed with Aspergers. We haven't told him yet, not because we don't want to, but because we don't know HOW to. I was hoping to get some input/advice on how it's best to tell him he's been diagnosed with Aspergers. Our younger son, who is 2 has PDD-NOS, so my oldest is use to the Autism talk.

In the Parenting Index stickie at the top of the page are links to several threads on this topic.

Tell your son/daughter about their DX http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt137433.html
Telling my son http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt146309.html
Tell or no http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt55117.html
Anyone else not telling their child their autistic? http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt110332.html
Help! Advice on telling your child they have Aspergers http://www.wrongplanet.net/postx151949-15-0.html

Our neuropsych advised us that most kids are ready to hear this information by the time they are mid way through the first grade so theoretically, yours should be mature enough to understand however, you know your kid best!

Here are some resources I think are positive:

Books: All Cats Have Aspergers, Different Like Me, I am Utterly Unique: Celebrating Strengths

Arthur Video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iq-VhfVwqp4

I also like this video made by a girl with Aspergers - age 13 with a brother who has classic autism. It is very positive.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejpWWP1H ... ure=g-hist

I think its good to start with the positives.

I have heard some people describe it as... its not something wrong with me, its just that I think differently

My son read a book in school and it had a character with autism in it. One day he said to me "Mom, do I have autism?" I asked him what he thought. He said it seemed like maybe he had a "little" autism or something along those lines . I told him he was right, he did not have a diagnosis of autism (he has NVLD and ADHD), but that his brain does work a little bit like an autistic's brain. We then just talked about how sometimes this makes things easier for him and sometimes it makes it harder. It worked out very well for him to bring the issue up first.

I have not told my daughter, who does have a diagnosis of autism. I will tell her when she asks or comments about how she feels different from others. Right now (almost 7) she does not notice she is any different than anyone else, except that she is smarter and a good artist. My son's social issues became glaringly apparent to him during his 7th year, so I imagine her perception will change soon.

Ive been wondering this myself, my 4yo daughter has AS and I feel like Im lying to her because I know, the family know, teachers know, a few friends know and she frequently asks "why doesnt anyone understand me", she seems like she knows shes different but at 4 is obviously too young to have any concept of autism. Bless her it breaks my heart but I need to wait a t least a bit longer until its formally confirmed and we have it in writing.

We told my son when he was almost 9. He liked the All Cats Have Asperger's book and another one. He also liked Greenturtle's cartoon on the general Wrong Planet forum. (There is a reference to a bad word but we glossed over it.)

My son is 9 and I told him two weeks ago.

I've been laying the groundwork for ages, pointing out how everyone is different and has different strengths and weaknesses.

He realised by himself that he's good at some things (maths, computers etc) and not others (making/keeping friends, social stuff).

Then one night I showed him pics of well-known aspies, talked about their strengths and weaknesses (and how they paralelled his) and told him that doctors have a name for it: Aspergers syndrome.

I didn't make a huge drama of it, and he knows there are lots of people just like him. I've let it settle in, and will discuss it more over time or when issues arise.