scale of -10 to +10, how do you feel right now?

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2.
Feel really out of it and foggy headed. Hate that feeling, makes me feel panicky. Just feel a little dissociated.

2 worried and sleepy.

10

Weird in a good way.

-100 because I cannot find gamers.

2.5
I'm so hungry it's painful.

^^ why are you not eating something then???


7. Getting dinner, chatting but feeling a little guilty as have been eating more lately. It is that dreaded time of chocolate craving.

-2. Recently discovered that my bank account is about empty and I'm still unemployed.

4. I binged on Subway and I have more to binge on. I also have my own pack of cigarettes. But I have to start fasting again tomorrow.

5
Just many thoughts...I'm listening to Native American flute music, and it feels like the breeze itself...or like water flowing...I'm lying on my back, and it's like the breeze is gently blowing into my face...or as if I'm sitting in a crystal clear, babbling brook...it calms my heart...Life...what is...

10 everything is going my way for a change

9. Feel pretty good.

10

My heart is pounding in a good way. I feel very alive.

5 My heart is pounding in a bad way...
mentally fine though

11. I'm drunk, and though I may be depressed tomorrow, I don't give a f**k right now.

0. I'm depressed as hell, but I'm great at fooling myself. I'm just not supposed to recognize that.

I'm just goint to edit this, since nobody esle has responded since me. downright suicideal, though for some reason I know I'll be able to fight it off. dropped the knife somehow, though for some reason I wan tto drive it through my neck. I'm sure some will view this is as some kind of cry for attention. I don't want atention. NOt even sure why I'm typing this. Maybe in defiance. Maybe to say this isn't oing to be it. I don't know. Not sure what's going on righ tnow. haven't felt this in several monthis.. this isn't a number, it is a fight. but I'm going to win. not sure who I am, in that respect, but I'm going t osurivfe. not that anyone cares. I"m not done yet. I may keep grabbing this kniefe, but I"m not done. i'd be lying if I saidn I wasn't sacared, but I don't nokw what brought this on. mabe this is a cry for help, but I don't think an;yone could help. which donesnt' make sense, if I'm the onlyoene that can sotp this, why do I care whot ather peolpe think. I don'tk now. but I"m not done yet. maybe I need to type this for myself. I'mn not f****n gdonte yet. i'n not done eyt. i'n bnot i'n not f*****g odne yet.

ok, this is a f*****g cry for attention, this is a cry for help, i've never cut before and I did just now, and I don't want to do it again but I do, and I don't understand that, I've never understood why peple would want to cut, but I want to more now and I don't undertstand that. maybe I just need somenoen to taok to, maybe that's all I"m trying for, I dont konmw, I'm jsut confused. I don't understand this at all. the cutting hurts, but it helps. I don't f*****g get this. I don't f*****g get this. I never thought I'd understand why people cut, and now that I'm doint ig t I sitll don't understand. I don't even know why I"mn depressed, I should be happy. I've got the rest of my life ahead of me. I'm getting two degtrees in am atter of days. I don't know why I feel so vulnerable. cutting doesn't make sense at all. if anyone has any koind of insight, plese tell me.