Here are some funny-ish stories that will hopefully cheer people up a bit. Once upon a time in a land far far away (the south of France), my Aunty Rosie bought an apartment. It was beautiful, the windows overlooked a shimmering sea, at the crack of 9:00 am, birds sung "Oh What a Beautiful Morning"(with French chirping accents of course), and there was a corner shop with a window full of lovely little pastries to drool over while eating celery. However, one morning my aunt woke up with a feeling that something was missing from the apartment. She turned over on her side and realized there was not a pillow under her head, not a bed under her body, and not a beret on her head. She was devestated at her lack of common sense to buy furniture for the new apartment, however, she perked up enough to locate a little cafe with computers with internet access. The possibilities were endless, one could search on any website one could imagine (excluding websites depicting porn, drug advertisements, hedgehogs being tortured, French fries being called Freedom fries, and mustard-hating rants). So, she plunked herself down on a chair in front of a computer and and googled the French furniture manufacturer, La Boute. She clicked on the first link and watched in horror as her worst nightmare appeared on the screen. It was a Giant picture of a bottom!
Just at that moment, the manager of the cafe walked by. He paused for a moment to look at the screen with a look of disapproval on his face. My Aunty Rosie turned towards him fearing the worst (the cops coming, being interrogated by the French Resistance and being deported back to England, leaving snails and frogs legs behind). With a hesitant laugh she managed to stutter out, "I'm just looking for some new furniture".
Now for the next Rosie story:
Once upon a long, long time ago (last year), my Aunty Rosie and her boyfriend Mark decided to spend a lovely little holiday on the little island of Jamaica. For those of you inept in the area of geography, Jamaica is where Bob Marley was from. They stayed in a little shack on the side of the beach called the Four Seasons hotel and slept in untill noon everyday. However, one morning Mark woke up with a hangover and an awful headache from drinking too much ginger beer the night before. So, he fell out of bed (literally) and decided to go for a jog on the beach. Out on the beach seagulls swarmed above Mark's head and distracted him so much that he didn't notice the seagull heading straight for his forehead. The seagull and Mark' forehead collided and for a few moments he saw stars. The seagull was walking around in circles on all twos. It was at this point that Mark noticed a man with dreadlocks and a bong sitting near him on the beach laughing. The man looked at Mark and said, "I ain't ever seen nothin' like that before!"
Last edited by ChrissandraChrissamba on 06 May 2007, 10:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.