I feel as if I am an idiot and everybody laughs at what i do

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Everything in my life could be described as the antics of a ret*d. I am an arrogant and delusional person and i confess to it. From a young age I thought I was powerful for some reason. I tried to manipulate other kids into following me. I did stupid s**t like run around with sharpened sticks. The school tried to send me to an asylum. My parents told me about it later and i was angry and felt betrayed. Now i realize the reason was that I am asylum material. i am crazy and a danger to society. people would be better off not having to be around me. People at school have told me since kindergarten that I AM STUPID DISGUSTING AND THAT I DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE. And they are right. I am ugly inside and out. I am a fundamentally evil person. A lot of people tried to show me kindness and I rejected it. I live in my parents basement. I am still 16 so i guess that doesn't sound bad yet. but i will probably still be here when I am 30. i caused my parents relationship to go bad AND MY DAD TOLD ME SO. My dad is a good person. he is not as aggressive as I am. I think he is autistic too. but he is the good type of autistic that helps people and is polite and has a high paid job and a family. my dad is so like me in a lot of ways. But there is one thing in my personality that is wrong that makes me evil. the difference between him and me is that. People always laugh when I walk down the hall. I'm probably pretty funny. I really am a joke. Doctors always tell me I am paranoid and everybody is just laughing at something else. BUT MY PARANOIA IS JUSTIFIED. because they look my way when they laugh. I used to be an autism supremacist because I wanted to deny that I was disgusting and evil. I wanted everybody to follow me and bend down to my level. But i overlooked the fact that i am worse than everybody else. I AM A ret*d. I recently found out about Christian Weston Chandler. He is very similar to me. He is an idiot who lives in his own little world in his head like me. He writes a stupid little hand drawn comic about finding love just like i wrote a stupid article on it. linked for you to laugh http://diversitydiscover.com/storiesandessays.html it seems immature now. I am not good enough to ever be married to anyone. I just broke up with a girl. she left me because i was being an ahole to her. It has taken me 16 years to be mature enough to doubt myself. to doubt my emotions. I am an ahole and I am standing up to say it because admitting it is as far as my stupid little mind can comprehend. people call normal people who hate trolls. they are not trolls. they are the people who should be elected to government, for not being afraid to attack weak people like myself for the good of our country. They represent the majority of normal people. yes NORMAL not NT.

I think there's two sides to a coin. So, for example, people working the famine in East Africa are probably calable of greater than average evil, which gives them capacity for greater than average good.

And teenagers laugh at all kinds of people who are different, for whatever reason. The doctors are probably waxing optimistically, or that's the way to play the hand even if it's only sometimes true.

Your dad should not have told you that. Yes, children can cause relationship issues, but only as one contributing factor. If things don't work out adults should take responsibility and not blame kids

There is a poem which begins "Tyger, Tyger". So, zen turnaround, accept the Tyger within you and consciously choose to do good (of course easier said than done, don't always get the opportunity)

((Hugs)) I feel your pain. I wish I could hug and heal it away. I have yet manage mine, but live for the moments in life that are joyful. There will be some. I tell my kids - anyone that wants to relive their teen years are fools. Teen years NT or Aspie is hard.

I bet you want a place to escape. Only yours, with only nice people are there. ((hugs)). I wish there was such a place. I would be there. I tried to find an emoticon that was a hug - there wasn't one so please accept these as hugs ((((hugs))))

Your dad is an ass. I am 38 - martial problems are only the fault of the people having them. Relationships are difficult. We are all aholes from time to time. We have to learn from them.

I think the problem is you are still a teenager and teenagers can sometimes be cruel.

I am 32, I walk funny, talk funny and I am always saying things that people laugh at because I say the strangest things.
Partly it is because I am different and I see the world in a way that other do not.
However I would not trade one thing about me for another person.
The simplest things make me happy and I can be enthralled with the world around me that other may not notice.
Also I would rather be autistic and happy then be normal with the possibility of being cruel like other people can be

When you get older things will get better, you will find that there are some pretty nice people around if you look.