A disturbing children's book

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wsmac
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04 May 2008, 4:08 pm

bheid wrote:

That's hilarious! and wrong in many ways!

What?
This?

wsmac wrote:

HEY THAT BOOK IS A COMPLETE RIPOFF!

I wrote a book about Asperger's Syndrome titled, "I don't have Asperger's Anymore"

In it, a mommy and daddy are too busy for the young child.
They buy him videos, game consoles, and Dungeons&Dragons Paraphenalia and lock him in his room when he is just a baby.
As he grows up, all the kids say bad things about him...

You're weird
You talk funny
You can't throw a ball
You're some kind of freaky brainiac

Then one day this old man happens to sit next to him on the city bus.
The old man reaches his hand over to the little boy... and...

hands him a pamphlet for Scientology!

Pretty soon the boy starts going to the bus stop every day to see his new friends!... Tom Cruise, John Travolta...
They play air guitar with him... let him fly airplanes... and talk about the future!

Pretty soon the boy realizes that all his life's issues are just the result of him having parents!
He moves away from home and joins his friends in preparing for the day when they....

Well, I don't want to give away the BEST part of the story... you'll just have to wait for the book :wink:

Meanwhile, I'm gonna have my agent and lawyers find this thief of a writer who stole my idea and made it a homo book! :evil:

This?

wsmac wrote:

Okay... so maybe he wrote his book first :evil:

It's called, "Alfie's Home"... althought I'm sure that's a misprint... shouldn't it be Alfie's Homo Uncle Pete (as in Peter, as in Penis :twisted:

)?

Here's where you can find the book for your own children... or yourselves you evil wicked homos...GOD and Mr. Cohen... will save you! :cheers:

GAY TO STRAIGHT DOT ORG

HEY! YOU! YOU BUNCHA HOMOS!

STOP THAT OR YOU'LL BE HUGGING THIS GUY REAL SOON! :twisted:

This?

wsmac wrote:

My next book will be either...

"ADD = All Drugs Damage: How I Beat My ADD/HD Into Submission With a FREAKIN HUGE BIBLE!"

or

"BOY!...You Ain't Trans-Anything So Take Your Sister's Dress Off And Cut Your Hair You Freakin' HOMO!... Love... Dad & Mom"

or maybe I'll just combine them all in one comprehensive children's book...

"Give Your Brain to GOD Cause Your Soul's Already Down the Crapper!"

I'll let you pre-pay now!

OR...

This?

GET YOUR HEAD RIGHT WITH GOD, BOY!

OR ELSE!

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spudnik
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04 May 2008, 4:17 pm

OMFG!

Trugen
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04 May 2008, 5:42 pm

MR_BOGAN wrote:

Maybe it was a book written to help children that have been abused

true dat
i mean many people who are 'gay' have been in that situation

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Hodor
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04 May 2008, 5:53 pm

Sometimes the LORD works in mysterious ways. Occasionally he delivers pamphlets.

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Trugen
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04 May 2008, 5:58 pm

Hodor wrote:

Sometimes the LORD works in mysterious ways. Occasionally he delivers pamphlets.

lol

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wsmac
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04 May 2008, 6:40 pm

Trugen wrote:

MR_BOGAN wrote:

Maybe it was a book written to help children that have been abused

true dat
i mean many people who are 'gay' have been in that situation

HEY YOU! Haven't you been listening?

Get Thee over to Mr Cohen's site... GAY TO STRAIGHT (otherwise known as: How to Unkink YOUR Life My Way!)

Unbend those mixed up feelings... make the RIGHT choice NOW... and be saved!....

CAN I GET AN AHHHHHHH MEN?

Thank You Brutha'

...and now, back to our regular programming...

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Kilroy
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04 May 2008, 8:50 pm

its a serious book

homophobic down south type ya know

I was never "touched" as a child, and have had good memories with my dad (mostly-but hey no one is perfect)
and I "turned" out...well ya know
that book is flawed :lol:

wsmac
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04 May 2008, 9:00 pm

Kilroy wrote:

Ah... but remember... it's not just a book... it's the reflection of the authors beliefs about human sexuality!

Hasn't anyone gone to Mr. Cohen's website yet?

Not that you don't already know where Mr. Cohen stands on the subject of Homosexuality... he believes it is all from external input and mental conditioning (I'm paraphrasing here), and that it CAN be 'cured'!

After all... He was able to finally 'Cure' himself of his homosexuality! :cheers:

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Kilroy
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04 May 2008, 9:09 pm

okay this isn't Star Trek and we are not Vulcans :lol: :lol: :lol:

"I find homosexuality...quite, illogical"
http://youtube.com/watch?v=uXq_Y5W3g9Y

wsmac
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04 May 2008, 9:34 pm

Kilroy wrote:

okay this isn't Star Trek and we are not Vulcans :lol:

"I find homosexuality...quite, illogical"
http://youtube.com/watch?v=uXq_Y5W3g9Y

Oh Mr. Spock.. when you look at me with those Vulcan eyes.... :heart:

... wiggle those ears for me Spocky Baby!

Now, if I were to have a sexual relationship with Mr. Spock.. that would be okay with GOD wouldn't it?
I mean... he's not human right? He's not animal... umm, not that I would WANT to have sex with Mr. Spock... just offering up the argument :oops:

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wsmac
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05 May 2008, 1:02 am

Actually, he's starting to really creep me out!

Someone call the poh-leece on mr spock and I don't mean the good old doctor!

I wanna know what his hands are doing? Keep your hands in plain sight mr spock you perv! :evil:

Where's Jerry Falwell when you need him?

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EvilKimEvil
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05 May 2008, 1:55 am

Oh, I guess I overlooked the symbolic meaning of the book. I saw it as a story about one boy's unpleasant experiences. If it's supposed to send a message about homosexuality in general then yes, it is pretty absurd.

iamnotaparakeet
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05 May 2008, 2:14 am

It argues from specific to general using one fictional example.

Kalister1
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05 May 2008, 2:46 am

Trugen wrote:

MR_BOGAN wrote:

Maybe it was a book written to help children that have been abused

true dat
i mean many people who are 'gay' have been in that situation

I think you might be right

I'm just so confused by things like this. I don't know what to think

Hordor: Why does your cow with a man face FREAK ME OUT SO MUCH?!

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05 May 2008, 3:55 am

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Danielismyname
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05 May 2008, 8:26 am

This is more educational, well, I think so anyway.

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