Anyone care to explain........?

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Does anyone care to explain why it is abusive to tell somebody that they have had a better life than you when it IS in fact TRUE?

Shouldn't the person just deal with it? Especially those who DO have it BETTER than me?

I wouldn't call it abusive, but it's one of those things that should most likely stay in your head. Some things that, although true, don't always have a benefit of being spoken.

well if I had it rougher than most people, than wouldnt it benefit them if I told them they don't deserve as much reward for me because they had it easy, and that just proves that they are weak?

Does the blind man have a worse life than the man with no legs? I don't really care. Your problems are yours, just as mine belong to me. We all have our own pain and difficulties we live with. You live inside of yourself, and know how your life feels to you. There is no way you can know how pleasant or unpleasant my life has been for me so far, because you do not live inside of me, or know my history. People can have empathy, or sympathy for each other, but can never know the internal pain of another. It is irrational to tell someone your pain or love is greater than theirs.

This type of logic is like: I love you. I love you more. No, I love you more. No, I love you more because I said "more" first. No, I love you more because i said I love you first. etc.

I saw the posts where you were put down for wanting to be a better person. It was wrong for someone to tell you your pain is not real or serious because of your age, or because of the things that happened to them. Telling someone that their problems do not deserve to be respected is a form of emotional abuse. People come here for support, not to be put down.

It's not abusive... just a bit pointless.

You might as well say "mine's bigger", "mine's better" whatever... does it make any difference if you perceive yourself to be higher or lower than someone else? Not really. Does it annoy people to be constantly corrected with one-upmanship comments - yes.

What do you want them to do? Make it better?

The funny thing is that I should have had a worse life than some of my friends. I've certainly had more and bigger disasters than some of them, more medical issues than most of them etc... but I don't feel that I've had a worse or harder life. It's because I take things so well, and in my stride. I've got a positive outlook that makes all the negative crap shrivel up and disappear.

It's not what you're given that counts, it's what you do with it.

BTW: I hope this doesn't come over all wrong. It's bad that you've had a tough life. I hope you're making the most of it.