Breaking my schedule makes me feel......

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I have a hard time with this, too. I'll intellectually realize I need to get out with people so will plan something, but when the time comes, it's a 50/50 crapshoot whether I actually go or cancel, because I'd much rather stick to my routine and be at home. This includes appointments and plans with friends, etc. I often just have to force myself to go, though usually once I'm out and among friends, I'm ok. Well, ok for a while.. LOL Then I need to get out of there and back home to "recharge".

I dunno how to do an official quote and am stuck in editing now, so quoting:

"My girlfriend has finally accepted my schedule. I come over saturday afternoon, we spend the weekend until after dinner sunday. If she is lucky (yes, if SHE is lucky) I may let her come over one night during the week, but it usually puts me into my "where'd my schedule go?!?!" mode and throws me a bit."

lol, lucky you! My bf just randomly decides to pop over, so I'm always on my toes when I even just chit chat with him for fear that he may decide to just come over. Frustrating too, I've wanted to watch this one movie for like, 5 months now, and every time he mentions watching a movie or coming over, I bring up the movie, and we never do wind up watching it, lol. I swear I'm about ready to throw the thing away just to keep myself from being so obsessed with thinking he has to watch it.

His grandpa also decides to randomly come over to bring things by, sometimes I get a phone call, sometimes he'll just show up and it completely freaks me out when someone knocks on the door and they aren't "supposed" to be there.

lol, hmmm might have somethin there... lol

I don't mind breaks in my schedule if the break provides a better option than my normal routine. I do like to be told in advance when certain appointments will occur.

I need to stick to a schedule as well or I feel like my day has gone to shambles. I have a routine I follow on a day-to-day basis.

I tend to have a very rigid routine, and changes to it really cause problems - whether in terms of outbursts of temper or periods of fretfulness.

lol, vegas-read on to make sure you mean 100% lol.

I can never get into a real set routine because with 2 kids anything can happen at any time (I'm always a wreck 'cuz I dunno where to start with setting a routine at all, and know it's a loss). I guess I must have one in some form or another, I just don't notice it because of chaotic moments, children fighting, screaming, running around, playing, etc... my son does react if I make dinner at a different time on a certain day, and it also bothers him when people drop by unnannounced, lol. He interrogates anyone that comes to the door and if they say they are just coming by to talk for a few minutes, he'll quickly "usher" them out the door.

Back to the bf dropping by thing, lol, he will interrogate the ENTIRE time he is here and keep asking questions about if he's going to spend the night, where he is going to sleep, what time he's going to leave, etc. So he's just as bad as I am-our house is chaotic enough without adding "surprise visits" to it, lol.

I can cope with adjusting my schedule if there's something I want to fit in (because I suddenly take an inerest in something and have to do it), or because its something I've forgotten to do (like pack stuff before I go out, thats why I've a routine so this should n't happen) I don't like it but I can cope. But it spooks me no end when someone else interferes with my plans and thus disrupts my schedule. This just seems to make things worse, I can't get organsied, can't focus, I just feel lost when this happens. This lasts all day or until I can re-establish my routines. Sometimes the problem is compounded when I can't explain the necessity for my routine to my GF, (or anyone else).

Oddly, I rarely have a schedule... However when I do have one, I have this urge to stick to it, to the absolute letter, or else I get more Guilt.

Anything that breaks my routine or messes up my schedule gets
me all mentally discombobulated, then I have to go to home and
stim and recharge my mental batteries.

I absolutely need to keep my schedule. So much so that I find it hard to add things even if I know about it and can schedule it in advance.
It took me about 3 weeks to take my car in to the repair shop and I only did it because I found out the warranty was about to run out.
Making appointments for a hair cut, doctor, or dentist. It just does not sit well with me and I basically don't bother to make them. As a result my hair is extremely long and have not gone to the doctor or dentist in a long time. I am normally pretty healthy so I rationalize it by saying if I was sick or needed attention then I would go, but until then I am fine sticking to my normal schedule.
I also find this prevents me from going to a new place or even stopping somewhere to shop unless I need to get something. My belt is pretty much a goner, but I have yet to find time to stop and pick up a new one.
Anyone got suggestions for working through this?

The difference on my mood that keeping to a schedule has is brilliant. I hate things changing, people think I am being petty and trying to cause a problem, but they do not understand the utter panic they have caused me by making me change my schedule!
I wish they could try being me.