paralysing aversions towards certain people

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IdahoRose
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19 Oct 2007, 11:42 am

I can't stand my sister. It's kind of sad, but I wish she wasn't related to me.



siuan
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19 Oct 2007, 12:08 pm

YES!! !! Wild that this post is here today. There is this couple who works with my husband. I absolutely loathe the woman to my very core. Every time I see her, my heart rate skyrockets, I begin to sweat and I feel shaky, like my legs went to jell-o. We actually used to get along (for the few times we met) just fine until she made a cocky ass comment about my dislike of being around cigarette smoke (while I was pregnant, no less). I didn't care for her company after that. I saw her photo on a family tree project our kids made (they attend pre-k together - happily at different time slots so I do not have to see her) and I still feel rattled by it.

She's one of those people I call Sugar Coated People. All sweet on the surface, and crap underneath. I think I have particular issues because she reminds me of a two-faced aunt I have. Smile in your face, stab you in the back sort.

I try to be civil when I see her, I try very very hard. I think I manage most times. There was a time I came off rude, but she was in my home days after I gave birth. I felt like crap, I didn't want ANY company, much less her. My husband was pissed because of how I treated her (mostly I was quiet, I wasn't mean). We argued a terrible argument. He took her side. Voila, hatred was born. Even thinking of that makes me feel as if there is a fire lit in my gut, I was hurt SO badly by that and I think to this day he does not understand (he's Aspie) and I doubt he ever will so I just don't speak of it. I lost a lot of trust after that, of my husband and of people in general. I don't think I ever felt hatred for a person in my life until that.


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Last edited by siuan on 19 Oct 2007, 8:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Rynessa
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19 Oct 2007, 12:12 pm

I can't stand attractive people, and I know why.
They remind me of people who were cruel to me in school.
Attractive people are socially powerful. They can expose and exploit the social weakness of an Aspie.



natty
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19 Oct 2007, 5:34 pm

my skin crawls and i cant look or be near certain people , it makes me panic and makes me look rude as i wont talk to those people, i cant the thought of it makes me sick. i think it is people who intimidate me or have power of me , actually its most people to certain degrees . I am agrophobic so try to avoid people when ever possible.



CockneyRebel
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19 Oct 2007, 7:29 pm

IdahoRose wrote:
I can't stand my sister. It's kind of sad, but I wish she wasn't related to me.


I feel exactly the same way about my sister. She's everything that my mum thinks that a young woman should be.


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Speedy
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19 Oct 2007, 7:38 pm

Used to be a guy at work, and I have no positive words for him. At all. I have never hated a person before, but this guy just took me straight back to when I was bullied at school. He would say stuff like, "is there something wrong with you?" or "you're weird, you are". If only I could spend five minutes with him and a sharp pencil. My mate would say, just agree with everything he says. I can't do that, if someone is wrong, the odds are my mouth is going tell them so.
Hated being bullied, never the bullies. I just pity them for not being better people. But that guy :evil: :evil: :evil:


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9CatMom
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19 Oct 2007, 7:53 pm

Smelly people and drunk people.



lastcrazyhorn
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19 Oct 2007, 8:24 pm

Khalaris wrote:
I think the people I have the worst aversions toward are those who I can't "read". Not knowing someone's motivation/intention makes me very nervous.


KNOW the feeling.

There was this one guy in high school in particular (there's been others since, but none as bad). I've never flipped anyone off in sunday school before . . . and I did him. Every time in middle school that we would cross paths, he'd say something mean to me, call me a name, say I was crazy, laugh his head off at me. He's the one who made me think that maybe I didn't understand the idea of humor, since him and his friends would always be laughing, but not ever tell me what they were laughing specifically at.

In the 8th grade, him and this other boy would throw spitballs at me during the class, so much so that I had to crouch on the floor of the classroom to avoid getting hit. The teacher never noticed a thing.

I could never ever say the right thing to him. Other people that I can't read, I can usually say SOMETHING that'll make them laugh. Never could with him. I had to put up with him for 7 years.

What was worse, was like what some others said, when I was around him, I tensed up more, so I looked like more of a moron than usual when he was around. There's so many things I dreamed of saying to him that I never could . . .


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hartzofspace
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20 Oct 2007, 1:28 am

I have had strong aversions spring up at certain people. So strong, that I literally feel ill when in their presence. I had a neighbor like that, and older lady. She was really nice to me whenever I had to interact with her, but I would stay distressed for hours afterward. She used to let me know when she was going shopping, ( I don't drive) and offer to take me too, so that I could stock-up. A few hours in her company, and I was ready to climb walls. She was also a toucher. I had to remind her so many times not to touch me, but she would forget. I finally got to the place where I politely refused any help from her. The feelings of relief were tremendous!


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