Suggestions on confronting people

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In the past year or so I found that I am owed money. Last January a gave someone a computer given they pay me back $150 on February the 1st. The 1st of February I got the "My grandmother died and had to drive to Tennessee" excuse. Between February and April I got all the "I was in the hospital" excuses. Then in April I got the "I was going to talk to you about the money and got a flat tire" excuse. Then I got all the "I'm poor and live on a fixed income and drive a 1986 Ford Tempo" excuse.

Since I bought the computer from a yard sale for $40 I decided to cut the debt to $50. The extra $10 is what I would use in gas getting to him. I got paid back $20 in October and I'm still owed $30 I was supposed to pick up in November. In the meantime I couldn't get to him at the beginning of November.

The person I live with says I should just drive over and demand the remaining $30. I can see her point but what if I don't get the money. Then I just wasted money in gas driving over there. Plus I don't like having to confront people over such manners, had some really bad experiences with that in the past. I also figure $30 is not worth the hassle of the police, small claims or dealing with a belligerent person. At the same time the person I live with says I just let people walk all over me, that I'm a "Pushover" handling things the way I do. I'm sorry but I don't feel comfortable confronting people, especially if they become irate. I do agree $30 is quite a bit of money (for someone on SSI) but is it really worth all the trouble.

I would give them a call, tell them that you are coming over to repossess the computer. If they don't want that they can come over to you by [deadline] with the money. Should they fail to show, they lost all their chances and no matter what, you are coming to collect the computer. Or you could tell them that someone else wants it and is prepared to pay you $150 so they should count themselves very fortunate that you are now only asking $50 but unless they come straight over with the money the price will be back to $150. Or tell them it is still your computer as they have not paid you for it, and another alternative is that the big, scary guy who is prepared to pay you $150 for it is prepared to go to their house and collect it. You have been badly taken advantage of.

It sounds like you have asked for payment on a number of occasions already, only to be rebuffed via sob story excuse. So it's reasonable to assume you have exhausted all polite avenues of obtaining recompense from this person. That is my assumption, please correct if wrong.

In this situation, and for this amount of money, I would let it go. Never loan money or sell equipment without upfront payment from this person again, of course. I agree that this is probably not worth all the effort and confrontation. Not worth the time or the courts or police for this amount either.

take him on judge judy. you'll both get $5000.

I can totally relate...I have a family member with a $45 dollar debt lol. It was originally $200. It has dwindled down over time. Usually because I knock money off for him fixing lil things on my car or whatever. This has been going on since 2008. I am VERY VERY VERY non-confrontational BUT yeah I could just forgive the debt and that is what I really want to do, BUT like I always say... it's the principle of the matter! The money doesn't matter, but the debt does and he needs to be made responsible for it. It is hard when it is friends and family. I HATE owing money to people and avoid it at ALL costs. and pay it back immediately when I am able to do so! I have been taken advantage of in the past as far as people borrowing from me and now I just say I don't have it.

Personally if I needed it I would probably harass them on a daily basis until they gave me the money. If I didn't desperately need the $30 I would just write it off and consider that a bargain price to learn how little the person in question respects me. I would then probably never deal with this person again until they had the consideration to pay up without me having to hassle them and also to apologise for the way they had treated me.

walk way with a 40$ lesson
cash up front

for some it takes thousands of dollars to learn this lesson, you learned it with just 40$. sounds like a deal to me

You need to get the money on principal alone. You have dropped the price on it and he still won't pay? Ask for the money or the computer. If you need to work on being assertive this would be a good start. Bottom line he owes YOU the money or the computer.

My guess is the person wants to trick you to get away with just paying little money, to exploit you. That's why you alway got those excuses.
Eventually, it might be better to call (or write an e-mail if you prefer that over calling just like me) and say "Listen, you still did not pay the remaining $30. You gave me $20/$50. I am waiting very long for this now and would like to finally get the money. If I won't get anything, I will come over, give back those $20 and take the computer with me. Theoretically, it still belongs to me as you did not pay the full price."
I would do it that way, it takes some courage but I think this is the only possible way of finally getting what you deserve.