Does anyone feel like they've run out of things to do
Yes I started feeling that way at 21 and now I am 37
Expelled from all the schools
Made redundant from all the jobs
Evicted
Dumped by precious lil "friends"
Nobody will hire you my worthless corpse again and when they do they make me redundant
Not interested in anything anymore
Ahedonistic
Limiting reagent
Kinda. Besides for taking care of things I absolutely need to do like cleaning, school work, etc. I basically just sit and do nothing most of the time, since I don't usually have the energy to partake in any of my interests. If I do manage to the enjoyment I get out of them is either very short lived or nonexistent at this point.
Expelled from all the schools
Made redundant from all the jobs
Evicted
Dumped by precious lil "friends"
Nobody will hire you my worthless corpse again and when they do they make me redundant
Not interested in anything anymore
Ahedonistic
Limiting reagent
"They f**k you up, your mum and dad
They may not mean to, but they do
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you."
_________________
A stranger, in an alien place.
that is when i would normally urge someone to pick up new interests, try new things.
but i know that can't always be easy, especially going through the initial phase where you suck at it...that's what happened with me when i tried to learn the guitar
i want to get into knitting and sewing, clothes for myself and for little dolls.
_________________
הייתי צוללת עכשיו למים
הכי, הכי עמוקים
לא לשמוע כלום
לא לדעת כלום
וזה הכל אהובי, זה הכל.
Dear_one
Veteran
Joined: 2 Feb 2008
Age: 77
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,721
Location: Where the Great Plains meet the Northern Pines
I have always had lots of things to do, but not always the will to do them. When the depression gets really low, I quit worrying about relevance, and just try to enjoy doing something. For me, it was returning to doing brasswork, which I had done before life got so complicated. For a friend, it was the chance acquisition of a machete. He took out his frustrations on his overgrown paths, and that got his blood moving enough to cheer him up.
Yop, that is(/was) me. Embraced by anhedonia.
One of the most hopeless feelings I've had to experience during my journey. Especially if it keeps being there for years, no matter how hard you try... You keep living, without purpose. You just keep going on and on.. Like a robot.
I had the money tho..
But money brings no happiness.
So .. do you have a job?
Do you like your job?
Are you overworking?
Do you get enough sleep?
Yes, I'm an obsessive autodidact and feel like I should always been learning, but run into obstacles:
- Not having enough money to buy what I feel like I need
- Not having enough room to house the things I want to buy
- Reaching an ambiguous intermediate level where lessons/tutorials are either too beginner or too advanced
- Feeling like I'm wasting my time and I'll never be good at it or have any use for it.
I spent years learning Japanese but I've still never been to Japan. I'm still not fluent, Japanese grammar is notoriously hard and without practice I'll never get used to it or retain everything. It's not relevant to my career nor do I know any native speakers in real life. I want to keep studying it because it's fun but I feel like I'm wasting time now.
I want to keep learning piano and music theory but I don't know where to continue from, I have a 61 key Casio keyboard, I want an 88 weighted key digital piano. So many songs I want to play require a wider ranger so I need 88 keys and they sound like garbage on the Casio, I also need weighted keys to get closer to the feel of a real piano. But high end keyboards and digital pianos are expensive. I also want to delve into music theory and learn to sight read (I use synthesia videos which is a bad habit apparently) but I'm not sure where to start or what I should focus on, long form piano tutorials are really boring because I know the basics and want to skip ahead.
I also want to learn coding, networking and server management, which is something that might actually help me career wise, but to do what I really want to do involves running virtual machines which requires a good PC that can handle it, or hardware for a homelab, again something I need money for, as well as space. I just have a crappy little laptop that I installed Linux on. I've done so many coding tutorials and online lessons and I'm tired of going through the basics and re-learning basic compsci stuff but with a different language and then hit a wall because of some weird error I can't solve which triggers my imposter syndrome or not have the creativity or smarts to build something on my own without guidance.
There are a million other things I think about and want to do but don't know how to get into it or don't feel like I can, or like I'm too old. I honestly wish I was back in school or had the time/money to just go to college or take courses. If I was rich I would go to school for the rest of my life.
And so you're just going on day by day like a robot.
_________________
[color=#0066cc]ever changing evolving and growing
I am pieplup i have level 3 autism and a number of severe mental illnesses. I am rarely active on here anymore.
I run a discord for moderate-severely autistic people if anyone would like to join. You can also contact me on discord @Pieplup
I have a chronic illness so I often can't really do anything beyond some puttering around and cooking. But I don't mind. I don't feel the need to be outwardly productive and to do things that other people can see. I am fine with what is inside my head. If you're feeling depressed that might not work, even the things that you think up yourself may elude you. But really there is so much you can enjoy that is not productive, like music and movies etc.
No, I've got a huge backlog of things I'd like to get done, so in principle I'll never run out. I do get times when I don't feel like doing much, but the work is always there as soon as I'm ready for it. I don't see that money has to be an issue. If a plan for getting something needs a lot of money, I can always look into ways of getting there more cheaply - in fact I've spent a lot of my life squeezing good results out of inexpensive materials and equipment, so it's second nature for me to look at how to do things on the cheap and I enjoy getting things for nothing. And I use computers a lot, and most of my programs are freeware. There's always more I can do with a computer, and I usually buy computers second hand so they're pretty cheap.
Even if I completely ran out of things to do, there would always be one remaining task - to find something interesting to do. That shouldn't be all that hard - I'd just take a look at my life and identify things about it that were annoying or worrying me, unsolved problems etc., and then pit my wits against them to figure out strategies for making things better.
I suppose I'm lucky that I have the sort of mind that's nearly always interested in that kind of thing. I don't really get depressed but sometimes I get phases where everything I've been working on has become bogged down, with no obvious ways of moving anything forward. But it's always passed eventually and I start to see possible methods for clearing the logjam, or maybe I'll just let the bogged-down stuff stay where it is and find something else that looks more likely to have a practicable solution.
I feel sorry for people I hear about who are lost when they retire, and I gather it's like that for a lot of people. I always wonder what it must be like to be only able to do anything if somebody tells them what to do and how to do it. I always resented that when I had a job, and much preferred to choose my own targets and my own methods, so when I retired I didn't feel lost or any less happy at all. Of course I'm happy enough to get ideas, inspiration and advice from other people, and I wouldn't want to be without that, but with the internet there's no shortage of those things.
And so you're just going on day by day like a robot.
I feel this day to day thing. I hate it so much. I used to have many special interests, but now I just have obsessions and none of them are healthy
I had such feelings.
But not because I literally ran out of things to do.
Because I'm stuck somewhere -- it can be for many reasons.
Apathy or depression, laziness or procrastination, anxiety or unwillingness, stress or tiredness...
It can be my head or my body messing with my head.
_________________
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