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do you ever feel embarrassed after an outing of UNmasking

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colliegrace
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07 May 2023, 10:03 pm

So I recently shared with my Sunday school group at church that my therapist thinks I may be autistic. It went over well, a couple of the adults in the class have children with diagnosed autism and that particular class in general just seems decently informed on neurodivergency.

We had a little group outing after church today, and I was definitely unmasking the whole time. Shortly after I got home, I felt very embarrassed about it. I didn't do anything actually wrong, but I am not used to unmasking around neurotypicals I guess?
I was also a bit overstimulated as we went to a restaurant, so that was part of it I think.


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RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | CAT-Q: 139 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)


MatchboxVagabond
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07 May 2023, 10:11 pm

colliegrace wrote:
So I recently shared with my Sunday school group at church that my therapist thinks I may be autistic. It went over well, a couple of the adults in the class have children with diagnosed autism and that particular class in general just seems decently informed on neurodivergency.

We had a little group outing after church today, and I was definitely unmasking the whole time. Shortly after I got home, I felt very embarrassed about it. I didn't do anything actually wrong, but I am not used to unmasking around neurotypicals I guess?
I was also a bit overstimulated as we went to a restaurant, so that was part of it I think.

I think that's probably normal. It's probably not embarrassed so much as selfconscious. I feel the same way frequently, which is why I limit how much I drop the mask at any given time. I here to eventually drop it far enough most of the time that I'm not super drained at the end of the day.



Joe90
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08 May 2023, 6:00 am

What are you like around people and masking vs around people and not masking? I'm just curious.


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magicantian
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08 May 2023, 7:18 am

Yeah, I do all the time, especially around people I like/can see myself liking. I’m sure this is a rather common experience amongst neurodivergent people, but I think I can also say it’s universal to feel guilt after some social situations…


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colliegrace
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08 May 2023, 7:57 am

Joe90 wrote:
What are you like around people and masking vs around people and not masking? I'm just curious.

I think mostly I'm more talkative about my interests, I put less thought into facial expressions and stuff. Fidget more openly. Yesterday in particular, since one of the parents with an autistic kid was there, I was talking about stuff like noise reduction devices and showing them my fidget toys. Her kid often wears the noise cancelling headphones in church, so I thought it was relevant.

I'm not 100% sure what I'm like masked vs unmasked, I just know that I put a lot less effort into restraining myself than normal yesterday.


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ASD level 1 & ADHD-C (professional dx), dyscalcula (self dx), very severe RSD. Probably have BPD.

RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | CAT-Q: 139 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)