Feel Awful when I wake up

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Hello

Can you help me understand please

When I wake up I feel awful, like I’m overwhelmed straight away. I cover my eyes to keep any light out and put in my ear pods to give me something I choose to listen to

When I go to the bathroom I put a large towel over my head to keep the world out

Over the next hour my super high sensitivity gets a little less so I can start my day.

The sensitivity and some anxiety takes most of the morning to clear making it difficult to work

This has been much much worse since death of my Dad last year

What’s going on, life is so hard like this

i draw my blackout curtains after dark, leave them drawn until i've had my wakeup pills and drink, then slowly open them to let daylight in unless it's too GD hot and sunshiney-bright out, then i leave them drawn. if i don't have to do any business on any day, i'll stay in bed unless my fiancée wakes me.