Gave up, and I feel fine!

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I've pretty much given up on the whole dating thing.

I'm too weird, too thin, too "atheist"' apparently, etc etc

So I've thrown myself into building my business a little more, and my special interests.

The really cool thing is that it really doesn't bother me that much - I'm having fun rediscovering all the things I shoved aside to find a relationship.

I'm sure this feeling won't last forever, but it might be something my fellow Undateables might want to consider...

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'm going to spend a huge wad of money on something completely useless.

Let me get this straight because I think I may have misread. You were going on 10 hour plane trips simply to meet up with people from the dating site?

I think too that it's our aspie traits more than any other personal traits that cause us to struggle. I've been currently dating someone a few months and during that time I've been so neurotic about the whole thing I've dragged him through hell and back... several times. Fortunately for me he's extremely resilient. I wish there was more research out there about adult aspies and the dating process because it's hard to solve problems you simply don't understand.

To me, I think another problem you seem to be encountering (unless I'm mistaken) is the problem of compatibility. You're unusual, and this makes you incompatible with the majority of people (like attract like). I've found myself than often I only ever meet someone I feel romantic attraction to once every 2 years or so, and I meet a lot of people!

I think the best and only way to continue really is to soldier on with your life, enjoy the non-romantic aspects of your life (as you seem to be doing!), while keeping your mind open to the possibility of romance if the right person comes along. I think in all honesty you're most likely to meet a compatible match which you're living your normal lifestyle, as the other person would then have similar interests and ideologies. I think meeting people via a dating site, although it may speed up the waiting process, is harder in this sense because you're searching from a pool of mostly incompatible people.

/knits Grisha an official Confirmed Bachelor cardigan, complete with missing button.

Actually there were a few responses on a thread recently that mentioned being too thin as a dating dealbreaker, even more so thatn being overweight (obviously this mostly applies to guys).

I have done everything possible to mitigate (my house looks like Gold's Gym), but there's a limit to what can be done. My legs in particular are borderline grotesque even though they are actually quite strong now.

People are not obligated to give you a reason for rejecting you, in my case I think it's often my weight.

Instead I find myself dragging all my diving/fishing equipment out of mothballs - I should be creeping out (and potentially eating) the local sea life in no time.

Don't go to Redondo Beach.

too "atheist" , in California who would have thunk ? Perhaps in the mid west yes but Calafirnia