Would you like to share a story of a past girlfriend?

Post Reply New Topic

mine was last year she goes to my dayprogram called Achieve her name is Mallory my first real girlfriend as an adult she's two years younger then me she is deaf and I did not know how to do sign language but I was happy at the time I got her a pink diamond from a Gem show and she liked it. Then I got her a Valentine gift then she wanted to go out with somebody else just like with her other dates they last short which caused me to have a depression. Were still good friends and are nice to each other still trying to find a girlfriend that would treat me nice.

Mine's a bit more complex and coated with dark humor. I dated a music student last year, and it ended up being an epic failure. The girl's parents and younger sister hated me, she was a bit bizarre and that wasn't the least of it.

Oh my....

Her name is unimportant. Red hair, pale skin, beautiful girl. Very intelligent as well. She had me hooked, and hooked HARD, from the first time we had spoken (over MSN, she lives in Ontario, I live in the Maritimes), and a few months later she came to visit, and we got along as well as I could ever imagine.

Over the course of a year, we had our ups and downs like any couple, but the feelings remained between us. She meant the world to me. The next summer, she came down to visit again, this time for twice as long (two weeks) and staying at my house (she stayed at a mutual friends last time).

It should not take explaining what happened during those two weeks.

Later on that summer, I went to visit her (again for two weeks). I was expecting it to be much the same, but the day I got there, she was cold towards me. She wouldn't so much as hold my hand. This continued the entire I was there, punctuated by me having breakdowns (I couldn't understand what had changed).

The day after I went back, she decided to tell me that we needed a bit of a break. The next week, she was dating someone else (who took advantage of her, then left her). Over the next year, she proceeded to date 5 or 6 guys, all the same. They would sleep with her then leave her. One of them sunk so low as to spike her drink, and rape her. Through all that time, I never stopped caring about her. It hurt, terribly. To me, all she was saying was "these guys are better than you".

A few months ago we began talking again. We were getting along, so I made it known I still cared about her and wanted to be with her. I was told how all I am is a fat, tactless, alcoholic a**hole who uses his mental disability as a crutch, has no future, and never will.

Did she actually use those words?

No

Started seeing her when I was 17. Two years later I take a trip to visit family in another state, thinking everything's fine at home. When I get back, she's gone. Took a few days to track down her sister who told me that she'd lied to me about being on the pill, that she'd cheated on me with 5 or 6 other guys, and that she'd gotten pregnant and run off to marry the one with the best job. I've spent the last ten years thinking every single day about how another man is raising what might be my son.

I'm not normally a hateful person, but I truly believe that the world would be a better place if she got hit by a bus.

Oh boy, this might be a long one so you may want to grab a snack and a tasty beverage. *deep breath*

This is about my most recent ex and pretty much the only one I consider to be important. We dated for a little over five years and she was about two and a half years younger than me. Some of this is a bit disorganized because a lot of it blends together and the specific sequence of events has been lost to me.

I was 18 and right after I graduated high school I was over at my friend's appartment browsing Myspace for a girl I knew from school. I came across a girl with the same name that lived about an hour away. I thought she was cute and had some nice taste in music so I decided to message her. We hit it off and a couple days later my friend and I went to meet her and her friend at a mall in the town between where we both lived. We did all of the goofy first date stuff you can do at the mall and concluded our date with a passionate kiss in a photo booth. We talked on the phone all night every night and hung out every week or two. She was awesome, I was awesome, everything was pretty awesome. We ended up losing our virginities together after about three months of being together.

After about 6-9 months I began to notice that it really seemed to me like she only cared about what she wanted, and would always disregard what I wanted to do. Simple things like choosing what movie to go see or where to eat had to be her decision. This began to eat away and make me feel as if she didn't really care about what I wanted (I later saw that this was indeed the case). During this time I was becoming closer friends with another amazing girl that I had everything in common with. I had a hard time understanding such a close friendship and developed strong feelings for her (this is another long story in itself that I won't go into right now). After about a year of dating I broke up with her because of my feelings toward my friend and the issues I was having with our relationship.

Well, after about a month of us still talking on occasion she met a guy on myspace chat and then a week after that decided to spend the weekend at his house having never met him before. He lived kind of close to me and on the night that him and his friend picked her up they stopped by my house to pick up a couple things of hers I had. While she was inside she proceded to ask me if she could have the bottle of flavored lubricant that we had bought while dating. This understandably made me angry, so I stormed into the bathroom with it and poured it down the sink and handed it to her. She gave me the most awful look and threw the bottle as hard as she could at my face and stormed upstairs and outside. I thought things were over and done with and i was quite relieved, but then there was a knock at the door. Her new b/f and his friend were standing there saying that I was harassing her and talking smack. I kind of brushed it off and told them to shove off and closed the door. She had sex with him the second night there.

They dated for a couple months and we still kept in contact. Him and his friends partied a lot. They would smoke weed and drink all of the time and he was a big pill head. She spent most of her time over there trashed. Eventually she found out that he had cheated on her a couple times and had a fit on him. I got a call one night and one of his friends brought her over to my house. We milled about for a month or so and eventually started dating again.

I suppose I should mention that during this time I was smoked weed and drank a bit. She was avidly aginst it when we met, but eventually she wanted to try weed. I let her and it was probably a huge mistake. I was pretty responisble with my use of such things but she had a very addictive personality. She was insatiable. I spent many a night babysitting her while she would drink to the point of vomiting and refuse to listen to me when I told her to stop. After she graduated high school she came up to my house and we went out to a party with my friend. I had started a part time job for a web development company doing programming and she knew that I had work to do that night and wasn't drinking. While we were at the party she decided to get pretty smashed and at the end of the night poured a full bottle of whisky into an energy drink can and took it out with us. She fell down the stairs leaving and proceded to walk aroundin the street until I wrangled her into my truck at which point she dropped and spilled the whisky all over both of us. When we got back home she fell out of my truck and stumbled inside. I began to attempt to work but she kept pestering me to pay attention to her. Things escalated and ended with me having one of the worst meltdowns I've ever had, being chased around the house, and my grandma calling the police. We didn't let them take her, but she still has yet to understand that what she did was wrong and refuses to forgive me for having the police called.

Things were pretty good for a while when we started dating again. I finally got my truck and was able to drive and see her a bit more. Having to have her way still continued and I accepted it. I pretty much gave up attemptingto watch shows that interested me and just picked up what she liked or didn't bother. There was a major point about three years in where she wanted to go to a flea market close to where her ex lived. I agreed, but like most of these situations when I did, extra stipulations were added after the fact and I was expected to do everything, regardless of what I wanted. She wanted to also go to the mall that we have in downtown Indianapolis and i reluctantly accepted it. Well, the day comes when we are about to leave from her house an hour away and find out that the flea market is only open on the weekends. She decides that since she is already ready that she HAS to go somewhere and wants me to take her to the downtown mall. I promptly refuse to make 2 round trips in a couple days time and she flips. I beg her to wait a couple days and she started screaming at me to leave and that we were done. She even started crying and said that she hated me. She eventually ran out to my truck and sat in it for a while (sometimes I wonder if some of my aspie traits wore off on her). This was the first time I ever questioned why I was with her and my affection for her began to dwindle. I ended up making both trips...

Shortly after we got back together we were in a Best Buy. She came across World of Warcraft and apparently had played it a little bit at the other guy's house. She bought our copies and we began playing together. It was fun for a while, but eventually it became a competition to her and she resented my aptitude for video games. She demanded that I stop leveling up so she could catch up. When she did catch up she refused to level with me and had to hit the max level first. After a year or so of playing we fell into the daily routine of her raging at me about not being able to do or figure something out, blame it on me, and then "break" up with me (I began to wonder who the aspie was in this relationship). This went on for quite a while until we finally quit playing. At that point it really seemed like the only thing we had in common anymore was that game.

There were a couple points in our second and third years where our arguements became physical. These tended to happen when I was staying at her house for an extended period of time. I would want to get away from her and wouldn't be able to and she would get into my face or grab/hit me and I would freak out. I never directly struck her, nor let my anger take complete control of me, but I did things that made me disgusted with myself (especially growing up watching my father and step father beat my mother). I did learn from these experiences and in the last two years of our relationship I never even allowed myself to get to that point and quite honestly hated the fact that I was with someone that could bring me to a point where I would be capable of such things. (I had a lot of anger issues when I was younger and my bedroom wall had many holes. However in the last year or so I have not allowed myself to get angry enough to lash out or destroy anything.)

I guess I should get into why I eventually broke up with her...

As I mentioned before, I used to smoke weed and drink. I stopped smoking it over two years ago and only drink a couple times a year now. She however continued to chain smoke pot and cigarettes and drink to the point of vomiting. The drinking got better eventually and she did quit smoking weed so she could start looking for a job. But what really did it for me was that she cheated on me at least twice while we were dating. The first time was with one of my best friends. We had an arguement and she was drunk and they all left my house to go over to another friend's while I stayed home. I came over to pick her up the next day and thought nothing of it but apparently he had a hickey. I didn't find out about what really happened until my birthday this last year when we broke up because of her other infidelity. She had just turned 21 and it was the first time she went out to a bar without me. While she was there she made out with an albino guy we had previously met (whose first words to me were "I want to find a girl to have kids with ASAP"). She then went home and ignored my calls and talked to him on the phone for hours. When I finally did get ahold of her she continued to lie to me about the situation. I was fed up.

We broke up for a little while, I gave in and got back with her for a short time and finally said &*$# this. I gave her back her crap, got mine back and was done with it.


Thanks for reading this if you did. It was more for my own personal therapy than anything else, but hopefully someone can gain something from the last five years of my life. I'm sure I left a bunch out, mainly about the observed effects of my AS on the relationship, but I am tired of blowing up this thread XD.

I bet you wish you had that tasty beverage now, don't you? :p

You must be pretty a pretty tolerant guy.

I've got an update on a story of my own tomorrow. We'll see how this goes.