People in me

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It's annoying because I want to be as "normal" as I can. I don't know what they are exactly. I know they're not good for me yet I feel like id be betraying them. They're Jack Stout and Vanessa. I can't mention them or I get lightheaded and can't stand or talk. Vanessa has been around since I was young. Jack has been around the same time. They feel so familiar yet I don't know them. Sometimes I think I'm influenced by Jack a lot. He has a lot to say but never says it to me just through me. I'm getting extremely weird feeling just saying this stuff. Well, he's an angry person and comes out around certain people but not around people I'm not comfortable with. He apologizes when I get angry because he doesn't want to be like that.

Vanessa just says weird things and vanishes. Jack influences how I dress and stuff. Also he feels like a friend but sometimes he gets confused and causes me issues like light headedness. I think I'm not really supposed to know about him or Vanessa because I forget stuff about them. It's an accident that I've figured it out. I just know it's happened but I never remember much. It's so confusing.

Yeah it is very confusing

It's good that you have these insights Crystal and it's double good that you are being able to sort it all out and talk about it

It's not silly or stupid what you are experiencing btw

That's because it is hard to understand

Sometimes people have difficulty seeing past the surface and they just want an easy solution or a diagnosis and they just want you to be fixed and that might come from a place of love who knows

When a person has such complex needs and difficulties as you seem to have a lot of people will have difficulty understanding

Most people can't even work out what's going on in their own lives