God endorses Awesomelyglorious

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Awesomelyglorious
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09 Jun 2010, 9:33 pm

God wrote:

Hey there, I know this is awkward, I usually don't talk to you people unless I am engaged in some elaborate plot to kill myself, or unless I am giving threats of terrible earthly suffering and eternal damnation, but I wanted to give a message to the WP Atheist community.

Awesomelyglorious is the strident atheist for you. I would know, being omniscient and all. Awesomelyglorious has thought and rethought his rejection of my existence, and he has put forward significant efforts in rejecting my existence, some of which can even be found on WP. He is even willing to write a recommendation by me for his candidacy for the category of most strident atheist as some perverse idea of a joke. Not only that, but he does his own campaigning. I mean, Awesomelyglorious, is a swell candidate, other than the fact that because of his stridency, he will burn in hell forever because I am kind of a dick.

So, you know, I being God and supposedly morally perfect, I cannot lie, and I will say that electing AG to most strident atheist will be the best thing for promoting people to reject my existence, blaspheme my name, and inventing elaborate schemes to deny me. If that is what you are looking for, then vote AG. If you believe in me, I COMMAND YOU TO VOTE FOR AG UNDER THREAT OF ETERNAL DAMNATION AND INCONCEIVABLE EARTHLY SUFFERING!! !

So, you see, even my greatest opponent, one whom I deny the existence of, is willing to say that I am the best candidate. And God cannot lie, despite the fact that he obviously doesn't exist, and I am just making up words to put in his mouth. So that being said, vote AG! I am quite STRIDENTLY atheistic.
(This message has been paid for by the commission to awesomize Awesomelyglorious)

Sand
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10 Jun 2010, 2:59 am

Awesomelyglorious wrote:

God wrote:

This scraggly guy who had a disarrayed mustache and a torn felt hat came up to me on the street yesterday. He asked who AG was. I asked who he was and he confessed he was God. I was surprised and questioned how come he was dressed so poorly. "Well", he said, "Isn't it obvious Satan has been in charge for some time? Just look at history."

"How come?", I asked. "I thought you had all the power".

"It's just I forgot to pay my power bill", He explained. And Satan runs the power company. Turns out Satan's real name is Berton Phlup. BP for short. God told me that if AG really wants to take over, he'd be glad to sell his position for a reasonable sum. He said he'd get in touch.

sartresue
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10 Jun 2010, 12:15 pm

No other gods topic

Now I understand why god is a no-name and no-face sort of deity in certain religions.

No one has approached the Hindus and other polytheistic religions yet to see if they could incoorporate AG into their god gallery, though AG might just be the jealous type. :lol:

Not that Awesomelyglorious asked for deityhood but you never can be 100% certain.

Just as well AG is a strident atheist, and incorruptable. :lol:

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Asp-Z
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10 Jun 2010, 12:42 pm

Sand wrote:

Satan runs the power company. Turns out Satan's real name is Berton Phlup. BP for short.

LMAO! Can I quote that in my sig? :lol:

iamnotaparakeet
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10 Jun 2010, 1:07 pm

"Inconceivable"

-Vizzini from The Princess Bride.

Actually, I consider the most strident atheistic to be Richard Dawkins, with the runner up being PZ Myers and in third place Sand. Awesomelyglorious is just good at politicking, but he's too reasonable to have the irrational anger necessary to be truly STRIDENT. Since this is false and God cannot speak falsehood, therefore God did not endorse Awesomelyglorious.

sartresue
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10 Jun 2010, 2:52 pm

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

Not lost in translation topic

Have menaings changed so much? :lol:

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NeantHumain
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10 Jun 2010, 4:59 pm

Awesomelyglorious wrote:

So, you see, even my greatest opponent, one whom I deny the existence of, is willing to say that I am the best candidate.

Sounds like crypto-theist logic to me!

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10 Jun 2010, 5:01 pm

NeantHumain wrote:

Awesomelyglorious wrote:

So, you see, even my greatest opponent, one whom I deny the existence of, is willing to say that I am the best candidate.

Sounds like crypto-theist logic to me!

Or a theist in denial

John_Browning
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10 Jun 2010, 5:54 pm

Awesomelyglorious wrote:

So, you see, even my greatest opponent, one whom I deny the existence of, is willing to say that I am the best candidate.

Does this mean that Fred Phelps endorses you too? :lol:

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waltur
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10 Jun 2010, 6:24 pm

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

"Inconceivable"

-Vizzini from The Princess Bride.

Actually, I consider the most strident atheistic to be Richard Dawkins, with the runner up being PZ Myers and in third place Sand. Awesomelyglorious is just good at politicking, but he's too reasonable to have the irrational anger necessary to be truly STRIDENT. Since this is false and God cannot speak falsehood, therefore God did not endorse Awesomelyglorious.

parakeet: have you not considered that he may be he who is? think about it.
"what if god was one of us?"
"god is awe somely glor i ous."

better than most conspiracy guessist evidence. =]

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Sand
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10 Jun 2010, 6:29 pm

Asp-Z wrote:

Sand wrote:

Satan runs the power company. Turns out Satan's real name is Berton Phlup. BP for short.

LMAO! Can I quote that in my sig? :lol:

I can't guarantee it's true. God is a wily character and obviously His mind wanders but it's OK with me. If God objects He'll strike you dead with lightning.

iamnotaparakeet
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10 Jun 2010, 10:20 pm

waltur wrote:

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

"Inconceivable"

-Vizzini from The Princess Bride.

Actually, I consider the most strident atheistic to be Richard Dawkins, with the runner up being PZ Myers and in third place Sand. Awesomelyglorious is just good at politicking, but he's too reasonable to have the irrational anger necessary to be truly STRIDENT. Since this is false and God cannot speak falsehood, therefore God did not endorse Awesomelyglorious.

parakeet: have you not considered that he may be he who is? think about it.
"what if god was one of us?"
"god is awe somely glor i ous."

better than most conspiracy guessist evidence. =]

You know, there is a similarity between the boy who cried wolf and car alarms. Some things just get old fast.

iamnotaparakeet
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10 Jun 2010, 10:25 pm

sartresue wrote:

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

Not lost in translation topic

Have menaings changed so much? :lol:

I don't know that the meanings have changed so much, but I tend to like etymological dictionaries since knowing the etymon of the word and the reasons the meanings have changed over time helps with understanding the sense of the word and thus proper usage also. As for strident, I suppose it hasn't changed in meaning all that much, though it is interesting to note that it referred to making an inarticulate grating screech.

Sand
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10 Jun 2010, 10:26 pm

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

waltur wrote:

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

"Inconceivable"

-Vizzini from The Princess Bride.

Actually, I consider the most strident atheistic to be Richard Dawkins, with the runner up being PZ Myers and in third place Sand. Awesomelyglorious is just good at politicking, but he's too reasonable to have the irrational anger necessary to be truly STRIDENT. Since this is false and God cannot speak falsehood, therefore God did not endorse Awesomelyglorious.

parakeet: have you not considered that he may be he who is? think about it.
"what if god was one of us?"
"god is awe somely glor i ous."

better than most conspiracy guessist evidence. =]

You know, there is a similarity between the boy who cried wolf and car alarms. Some things just get old fast.

Considering Christianity, not fast enough.

iamnotaparakeet
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10 Jun 2010, 10:33 pm

Sand wrote:

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

waltur wrote:

iamnotaparakeet wrote:

"Inconceivable"

-Vizzini from The Princess Bride.

Actually, I consider the most strident atheistic to be Richard Dawkins, with the runner up being PZ Myers and in third place Sand. Awesomelyglorious is just good at politicking, but he's too reasonable to have the irrational anger necessary to be truly STRIDENT. Since this is false and God cannot speak falsehood, therefore God did not endorse Awesomelyglorious.

parakeet: have you not considered that he may be he who is? think about it.
"what if god was one of us?"
"god is awe somely glor i ous."

better than most conspiracy guessist evidence. =]

You know, there is a similarity between the boy who cried wolf and car alarms. Some things just get old fast.

Considering Christianity, not fast enough.

It's not going to either. Get over it.

skafather84
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10 Jun 2010, 10:35 pm

Of course god endorses you. What good is good with no opposition?

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